Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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