I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Randomize
