but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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