Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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