i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
