I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
i out mim tonsoeep
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