She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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