My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
