I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
