Who wears a wallet chain?!
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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