Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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