Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize
