Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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