I CAN MOONWALK!
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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