ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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