Only a mothe r could love this liver
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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