I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
