Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
