I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
