She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
