You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Randomize
