a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
