Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Barsexuality is the new black.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
