just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
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