Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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