i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
