I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
