And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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