yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
