I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
