that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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