i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
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