Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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