I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Man, jail baloney is awful.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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