So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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