left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
