I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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