oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
