You're so nebulous sometimes
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Houston, we have a blender
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
