oh god the rape fog is back!
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize