i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
