Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
