They should really pass out barf bags in church
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
