Plan B is the new Plan A
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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