i'm signing you up for texting rehab
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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