She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
This is classic penis vs brain.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I need water and some morals
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
