Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize