Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Your cock deserves a montage
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Randomize
