Pregnant stripper...not hot.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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