I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
