Kiss
Puke
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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