guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Randomize
