oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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